[ more cricket humor ]
The village teams were ready to begin their match but discovered that they were without an umpire.
They decided that they would use a member of the crowd even though he knew nothing of the rules.
When he was dressed in his white coat and hat, he went up to the captain of the home side. "What do I do?" he asked.
"It's very simple," said the home captain. "When I shout "OWZAT!" you simply put up your finger and say "OUT".
When it's our turn to bat, I'll tell thee a little bit more!"